Have you ever felt like you needed to forgive yourself for some things that you did to yourself or that you allowed to happen to you??? I have too! But guess what? You don’t have to remain in that place. I mean if GOD has already forgiven you, who are YOU to still hold yourself hostage? Take a look at the process I went through to forgive myself and to allow myself to live free in Christ!
First, let’s define the word forgiveness. According to Merriam-Webster, forgiveness is defined as:
*to give up resentment of or claim to requital; forgive an insult
*to grant relief from payment of
*to cease to feel resentment against (an offender)
So now lets start the process:
1-You need to identify the hurt that you have caused yourself. Stop sweeping it under the rug and look it square in the eye so that you can see what you are about to let go and get rid of.
2- Understand that forgiving yourself is not about forgetting. It is about not bringing the offense up to yourself in negative ways. Forgiving yourself is simply letting go of what you are holding against yourself so that you can move on with God. If God has moved on, shouldn’t we do the same? And to add to that, don’t allow others who may know of the decisions you have made that weren’t so great, continue to bring them up! Let them know that if they want to stay stuck in your pass mistakes that is there business, however, you have chosen to move forward and will no longer participate in the conversation with them.
3- Knowing that forgiving yourself is a PERSONAL ACTION. The energy it takes to harbor anger, hatred, and resentment towards yourself is exhaustive. Every bit of energy we give to negative activities and dwelling on regrets, robs us of the energy we need to become the person God wants us to be. Forgiving ourselves does not let us off the hook, it does not justify what we have done, self-forgiveness is a choice that takes courage and strength, and it gives us the opportunity to become an overcomer rather than remaining a victim of our own scorn.
4- Forgiving Yourself is Helping Others and yourself. The longer you avoid forgiving yourself, the longer you allow yourself to harbor the feelings that you deserve to suffer for what you did, the more explosive you will become and, therefore, the more apt you are to hurt others. You have to, again, remember that while you cannot change what has happened and the decisions you have made in the past, forgiving yourself will allow you to truly heal from the inside out change the direction of your life. And remember this: “In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace” Ephesians 1 vs. 7 NIV
5-Remember that even though you made decisions that were different from the path that GOD has for you and even though you may have had to deal with the consequences of those actions, you are still GOD’s child. And he still loves you. Isaiah 43:1 NIV reads, “…Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine.”
Those words weren’t just for Isaiah, they are meant for you too!
These are some notes that I wanted to share from my podcast episode titled: “Dear Taria…I forgive you. Love, Taria…” Episode 28.
To listen to the full podcast episode on how to forgive yourself and hear my letter of forgiveness to myself, click the media player below.